The Best of Quarantine: #1- Host

 I love lists. And just like I love lists, I also love, and deeply miss, going to movies and getting totally lost in entertainment, leaving my troubles behind.

I also love a fantastic tv series. A series that is so good it NEARLY clubs you into a concussion reality where your apartment is only hazy fuzzy background noise, while the story holds your attention squarely, like a hand gripping your face and you’re not mad about it in the slightest. Yes, you absolutely have my full and total attention. And somehow I don’t want you to let me go.

If you’re reading this from the distant future, hello from the raging pandemic of 2020–2021 (please let the end be in 2021).

If you’re reading this now, in the horrific present of 2021, you may be bored out of your mind, potentially turning to read shampoo bottles for the ever witty, yet semi-rare instruction, “C’mon, you know what to do with this bottle, baby! Why are you reading this? :) :) ❤”

Those rogue copywriters at hip shampoo companies are truly living their best lives every goddamned day. The rest are pretty much left to cut and paste from whatever boring old shampoo bottles they have at home, but maybe jazz things up with an oxford comma or say one should take an additional ENTIRE minute washing one’s hair, just to be bitter and feel they have some power and control over this mad mad world.

If you are quite done reading the directly branded content, why not dive into the beginning of the great list of my favorite quarantine discoveries?

HOST (2020, Shudder)

Host was conceived, shot, and released all in quarantine and is set in it as well. (Yes this does make me feel unproductive. And yes, it is March and my fake sparse Christmas Tree is still standing).

Sure, you may look to movies and TV to escape the real-life daily horror shut-in many of are experiencing. However, If you want your entertainment to be a little closer to home, this may just be your jam. Pre-Covid, I loved “Billy on the Street,” but now, I cringe every time boy wonder and source of joy Billy Eichner comes closer than 6 feet to a stranger, HE MUST BE PROTECTED.

Back to the little horror movie that could, Host. It’s scary, but not gory. It’s smart and it loves a callback. Unlike that final season of Game of Thrones, not a thread is dropped or wasted. Everything is valuable, every tiny detail and that, along with amazing acting, effects, twists, turns, directing, I could go on forever, makes it my number one pick of the pandemic entertainment set. It’s set within the time constraints of a free zoom call which at this point, I think most of us know and appreciate. And yes, dear reader, there are people who pay for unlimited zoom, but they are not my people, so hashtag relatable content.

The cast is nearly all women with one odd man out and I went into this without seeing the trailer or knowing much about it. I want to encourage you to go in without seeing the trailer as well since this movie is under an hour and every trailer I checked out spoils some gold moments. The rapport amongst the cast members feels so natural and authentic, at times you’ll feel like you’re a part of the zoom live crew.

The shorthand of this is in present-day an eclectic group of bored friends decide to try a seance over Zoom with a not entirely reliable spiritual guide they’ve already paid to help make it happen. And that’s really all I want to tell you. I’m a fan of horror movies and not only did this leave me feeling elated like I’d just gone through something entirely and utterly unique, but also certainly making sure my closet doors were shut and my Himilayan Salt lamp was aglow the rest of the evening.

It passes the Bechdel test, it makes you care about the characters and fleshes them out in record time. It feels honest and real, all the characters seem like the people you know and genuinely like; only, in this case, the people you know and like are putting you in a dire situation that will leave you hugging your pillow (or still standing Christmas tree.) It’s inspirational to filmmakers and storytellers and collaborators that with gusto and a great idea, you can make something brilliant, affecting, and fun happen. You can make it exist.

I shouldn’t quote the Muppets in a write-up on a horror movie, but in the great words of Kermit The Frog, “Life is a movie, write your own ending, keep believing, keep pretending.”Without the gung-ho spirit of the independent filmmakers, I would not have had the most delightful scare of the pandemic and I salute them.

Reading up on the film after is a must, the actors made the scares happen in their own homes during the quarantine and largely set up most of the gags themselves.

Fun, rentable, available on Shudder.

Stay tuned for later editions and until then, stay safe my darlings.

Maria Walsh-Cole

Maria works in entertainment & yet can't seem to stop consuming media in all forms & all genres to share with you. She lives in LA with her fake Christmas tree.